Sunday, March 1, 2015

The power of the yoga pants


Joke? Or real? You decide!

Lately there have been more and more blogs and other pieces that come out, denouncing women for wearing yoga pants in public.  I mean – yoga pants!  They’re clearly just a small step away from the devil’s doorbell!

But, seriously, because of all the noise, I decided that I should go ahead and wear my yoga pants out in public.

And now, after wearing yoga pants in public, I finally understand why men feel the need to rape women.

The power trip!

Knowing that I’m forcing my will on an unwilling person – making a man look at me (against his will, of course, because wearing a pair of yoga pants forces a man to have a wandering eye)…the power!  The trip! The sexual content!

Really, I had no urge to do it before, but now that yoga pants are considered so evil, I just want to wear them every day.

Wait, you say.  That’s not true.  Men aren’t *forced* to ogle women, even if they are wearing pants that cling.  Men don’t *need* to rape women.  This is clearly a false analogy.  Rape and yoga pants aren’t the same thing.

You’re right.

I totally agree.

It’s absolutely ridiculous that the ‘news’ is filled with blogs about the evils of yoga pants, yet rape takes a back seat.  Just recently, Houston decided to go ahead and look through a backlog of 30 YEARS! of untested rape kits and found 850 DNA matches.  850.  And that's just in Houston.  Seriously, wtf, world?  Why are we focusing on the evils of yoga pants when we should be focusing on serial rapists? 

So, me, I’m going to keep wearing my yoga pants in public, but, somehow, I’m also going to restrain myself and avoid raping people.  It’s amazing how that’s possible, but it is.


No comments:

Post a Comment